Developing Personal Resilience

Business founders bring their whole self to their businesses, which is what makes those businesses unique. But the consequence for founders is that the business often takes a toll on their personal lives, their relationships and their own well-being. Many things weigh heavily on founders. The long hours required, especially at the beginning, and the uncertainty of business when times get tough. The relentlessness that often comes when the buck stops with you and perhaps, most importantly, the knowledge that other people's livelihoods are dependent on you. 

This is why we believe in first working with founders as people, and then working with them on their business to make sure the business serves their needs, rather than them ending up potentially enslaved to their business.

So let's talk about the concept of resilience; what it is and how founders can develop it for themselves and for their staff. According to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, resilience is: 

1. "The capability of a strained body to recover its size and shape after deformation caused especially by compressive stress." 

2. "An ability to recover from, or adjust easily, to misfortune or change." 

What's important about this definition, is that resiliency does not imply that nothing affects resilient people, rather, that they can bounce back after encountering rejection, misfortune, and failure. 

Resilience is something that is particularly important for business founders, who have to deal with the potential that their ideas and products may be rejected; the likelihood that they will encounter some misfortune in their business; and the possibility of failure as par for the course of owning your own business. Some of us are blessed to be born with a 'happy gene' which naturally helps us be more resilient, while others find it more difficult to do so. 

What I find particularly helpful when working with clients is the concept of downward-spirals and upward-spirals when it comes to well-being and adjusting well to the pressures of owning one's business. What do I mean by that? A downward-spiral occurs when a founder perhaps is having issues at home; she or he becomes more stressed and less able to give good direction to staff. Staff might begin to grumble and perhaps not do what they need to, which makes the founder even more stressed. The founder now feels the need to do everything. She or he stops exercising, eats unhealthily and sleep suffers - leading to even more stress and maybe resulting in succumbing to a long period of being physically unwell. And so on and so forth. 

So what can you do? First of all, recognise that you might be in the beginning of such a spiral. If you are, you can start another, upward spiral to restore your well-being and build your resilience. 

I am passionate about making sure founders get enough physical exercise, as it has been shown to be crucial for maintaining both physical and mental health well-being. You might want to engage someone to work with, who will listen and be willing to talk to you about all aspects of your life, not just the business - so you have a sounding board rather than getting caught up in endless negative thinking in your head. 

You can also make sure that you get enough sleep - and even though it might seem impossible, take a short break to breathe and think properly. 

THINKING POSITIVE - The thing is, the downward spiral might still be happening; the stress at work may remain the same, because the upward spiral isn't about reversing that downward one. It is about building your resilience batteries so that you are better able to cope with the ongoing pressures. 

Research has demonstrated extensively that cultivating and experiencing positive emotions are key to developing resilience and that we can develop and experience those at work. 

I find that the founders who are clear about their own values, and how their businesses reflect those; who get up every day knowing what the purpose of their business is and where they are going, are extremely resilient. That is because working on something that gives you meaning and purpose fills your resilience reserves; it promotes a deeper level of positive emotions and perhaps most importantly, it is a lot more fun than thinking about work as an ongoing drudge. 

I have seen founders who could handle a tremendous amount of adversity and still bounce back. Why? Because they are crystal clear about their values, their business values and the purpose they built their business to serve. My advice? Start here, before you get into the downward spiral. It is a win-win way that will benefit your business and your life.